wow its beem a while....

i dont even know why im writing in here...its either the fact that im completely bored or the fact i have so much on my mind lately and i just need to write it down to figure it all out and maybe help me get some sense out of this mess.

where do i begin? i was released from the army lik a lil over a month ago. i miss ALOT i dont know if its the army i miss so much or maybe just the frame of like doing something every day and being around friends like 24/7 and not ever havin to worry bout money or boredom or ne stuff like that. god i miss it so much. but the thing is as much as i miss it, if i was asked to come back right now id probably say no. just because im relaly scared i'll go back and things wont be as i remembered them and i'll get disapointed. i guess in alot of ways its like bbyo haha. i know it sounds weird but at first it was alot of fun and i never wanted to leave it or do sumtin except for that but with time my friends left the reason i loved it so much mainly faded and i was left w/ bunch of fights and bad memories. i dont want the army to end up like that, i wanna always remember it as the best thing that ever happend to me and that id always wanna do it again (and i do). i hate bein all grown up, i suck at it. i wish so bad i could go back to being like 16 or 17 and live w/ my parents and just do all the things that normal lil kids do. its not that im scared of responsibility or cant do it, its just that its alot of stress and alot to worry bout and i just miss the whole comfort zone thing, i just dont think i have it ne more. i mean yea my parents still pay for like 70% of my life and i know im not like totally alone that thrown out there in the real world but i feel like i am and as much as i like bein independed and "living on my own" and all that bs i just really wish sometimes that maybe just maybe i could just not.

now boys: ugh like the biggest weakness of my life. i realy do suck at making the right decisions when it comes to boys, like whats wrong with me? every single guy that was ever like good to me or actually liked me or was sweet and cared i didnt want, not only did i not want but i pushed away. and yet by some sort of weird stupid brain activity i like and  cant live w/ out the "ultimate jerk" like seriously. i know all girls are attracted to bad guys and all that bullshit which is COMPLETELY TRUE but c'mmon i really need to stop. i cant help it though! theres this guy and its not like i even like him that much or ne thing but just bc hes like such an "asshole" (not to me tho) i like him. he treats alot of ppl i know like shit and hes done ALOT of things in his pass that are not exactly "pure and innocent". yet hes just so charmin and hes so nice and cute and attractive and has such sex appeal but NOOOOO gal stop! i wont, i shouldnt, i really just cant. theres like 3 million reasons why i should stay atleast 10 miles away from him at all times but yet i cant keep w/ in 10 fingers. and no its not like hes just some random guy that i barely see. this is like one of my best friends, hes like always around and always invited and always just like there! why? ahhhhh i just need to force myself to stop acting on impulse and start acting w/ a lil reason. yea yea yea i can talk all day long but it still doesnt change the fact that next weekend we're gonna hang out and i'll probably drink and do the same mistake i always do... so cheers!

i hate it. why do you think you can burst into my life with out any notice and hope it'll be just like it was way back when. i'm not your toy you know. i have feelings and you've hurt them more than you can possibly imagine. all this time you were way too busy to come and say hi? you didnt have a single second of your busy summer schedule for an old friend? that's fine i guess i can live with that. But don't you dare to turn me into another one of your great midnight stories. you can't call at 2am and get mad for not answering, and you can't just march right on in as if everything was great. i love you and you know that but i still can't get over alot of things. call me selfish or call me immature i dont care. you can't do something and not suffer the consiquences for it... no matter how long its been. the purpose of this isnt to yell at you or prove you wrong. i could care less about how you feel. i am glad we got a chance to talk bout it and explain some things. in a weird way it does feel like a certain closure...

Dallas: wow i dont even know where to begin. my time here felt soo short! it feels like i just got here and i didnt get a chance to do half the things i had planned on doing. wait no i take that back...the major big important things i wanted to do i did get done but there are those little things ya kno? they really dont mean much and they may not sound like the biggest thrill but they are to me. i dont know how 3 weeks managed to slip between my fingers. i dont want to go back, i'm not ready. i mean yes i do miss israel and miss my friends (and sooooo excited to see sivs) but i'm having fun here and this is like a vacation for me i've been needing for quite some time now. i dont want anyone to take this the wrong way but none of yall have changed....all of you are still the exact same way i remembered yall with just maybe a little twist. it's not a bad thing...its wonderful. when i came here and saw yall it really felt like i never left. things weren't awkward, we still had all of this stuff to talk bout, and it really just felt like i went on some short vacation and i came back and everyone just filled me in. living in israel and hearing about all this stuff that was going on in dallas made me feel really out of the loop and kinda distancesd but like with in minutes of me being here (the first night) i just felt right at home again. thank you to all of you who made me feel welcomed and loved me again and showed me that you all havent forgotten bout me, i was really worried bout that. incase i dont say it enough, i really do love yall and you dont even know how much i talk bout yall in israel and miss you guys like crazy! like literally if you come to israel and say your name my friends could like tell you ur birthday, ur greatest story, ur most emberessing moment, and so on.....
just a few more days and this will all be another one of my great memories. i know the cliche saying with time people grow apart but i hope that doesnt apply to us, i wont let it. this is not a goodbye...its a see ya later (usher music... hahaaha sivs)

at last we meet again....

well hello there. i know i havent updated in like years but i feel like i need to and plus im a little bit bored. i dont even know where to begin... last time i updated was 4 months ago and i guess alot and yet nothings changed since. im still in the army and i still love it. i love my friends that are in it with me, i love my job, i love the hot boys that i get to see every day and i love the atmosphere thats around. me and 2 of my friends from the army (maya and hadar) are going to the black eyed peas concert this saturday, im VERY excited!!! in less than a month it'll be one year since i moved outta dallas to israel and it really makes me thing whether i made the right decision or if i changed? well yes, i do believe i made the right decision and yes it definitely changed me in so many ways. i dont think im as immature as i was and i definitely see things from a different point of view, im not gonna lie and say im no longer spoiled or that now i work to get my own things but i do have a much higher appreciation for money and the fact that now i kinda live by myself with like 6 girl roomates, that really taught me to settle more and learn that i can't always have my way (even tho i still really wanto). i also learned alot bout what being a good friend is. its no longer all bout me and how do i make my life easier. now we do things together and we help each other because what one day you do for you friend, the next day you'll want it doen for you.

i love my friends here (not the army ones) the ones that stuck beside me almost since i got here. i cant believe that with some of my friends i almost have one year anniversery. i know we had our rough times and our horrible times but most of all we had our great times which i loved and enjoyed. i honestly dont know what i would do with out these people in my life. they have seriously been the reason i had the strength to get up every morning and do what i do. i dont think you can imagine how hard it is to go from a life that you have everything and your parents and your brother and freedom to a life nearly with out any of those. not that im sayin im a slave to the army or ne thing, its just that i cant go and leave as i please and i can't just wake up one morning and decide i dont wanna go and that i wanna go to the mall instead and i can't not go because i feel sick and i can't go out of town and i can't leave early or ditch something i dont wanna do. for every action theres a reaction (punishmen) and i dont like gettin punished. anywho back to the original topic, yea i loev my friends and if i like the person ive become then i only have them to thank for it.

oh by the way did i mention that IM COMING TO DALLAS JULY 3rd!!!!!!

anywho god i miss all of you dallas people i really cant wait to come and see yall again. i hope yall havent changed too much, and you have changed i hope its for the good and that you still remember me.  congratulations hoes i cant believe yall graduated...wtf??? my little babies grew up so fast and i wasnt even there to see it or be apart of it... i feel like such a bad mother. how can babies grow up with out their mother? i wish you nothing but the best of luck in the future and this is not like a sad goodbye thing cuz yall are stuck with me for the rest of your life but i just wanted yall to know again how proud i am of all of you and how much i love yall and happy for you! YOU DID IT! you finished highschool...welcome to the sorta real world (for you americans welcome to the alcohol and sex world) and for you sivs... welcome to the army and still alcohol and sex world haha.

just remember girls....i'll always be there!

well hello party ppl!!! yes yes omg im actually updating haha.

well nothin too new or exciting has happend to me lately so this is gonna be short. still in the army... im loving it alot more. its so much more interesting than wat i originally thought it would be. i feel imported...i feel like im actually doing something and not just sitting at a desk and serving cofffee to the boss. social life: well my social life is great... i have my friends back home who i adore and love to hang out with and then i have my friends in the army who im inlove with cuz they're just so crazy! in the army every tuesday night ALL of the base goes to this pub in the city and we all get trashed and dance. i mean yea we go out at 9 and we come back at 12 (army next day) but hey its still the shit cuz theres like 200 ppl there.

hadas joined the army last tuesday... that lil skank hasnt called me or told me ne thing bout where she is and wat is she doing and i called her like atleast 3 times. oh well im sure shes busy, i was too at first.

im really hoping to come this may! i already asked for approval of the guy thats incharge of me (btw im inlove w/ him hes soooo hott haha details later) and he said sure...now all i gotta do is to get the final okay from the authority ppl of the army but thats gonna take a while....i should kno for sure by the end of march.

I MISS YOU HOES!!!!!!!!!!! i found a bunch of old pictures last nite as i was trying to unpack this mystery bag i found in my closet. awwww we had some amazing times together!!! keep up the hoe work love yall

heeeeeeeeeey yaaalllll! yes im finally updating after like months and months of not doing so.... sorry to all my loyal readers haha hoes i love yall! so israel is cool i really like it here. its so much different than dallas in so many ways. here you dont come home like at 1am...thats the time you only go outta ur house. here NOTHING closes at 10 like 99% of the places in dtown. here you can drink at whatever age u feel like it at whatever place u want (i dont really drink that much ne more tho..... i gueesss its not as fun when u kno its legal haha). and here theres alot more places to go out to (not starbucks haha). unfortunately tho i dont get to go out that often. im in the army most of the time....i come home once every 2 weeks for a weekend. But when i do come home i try to go out every nite because its fun and i love my friends here. Dont get me wrong tho, im not complaining i like the army and i like what i do so its cool. speaking of the army, its alot different than what i thought it would be back in dallas. its alot of hard work and i dont think i ever in my life studied so hard and so long as i do now. its fraustrating at points and yes theres been times where i was like fuck this i wanna go back to america but it all became worth it eventually. im not done tho.... i still have like atleast 2 months of bitch ass studying to do but then when i finish with that my life will be like heaven. in the army i live like in a cute lil apt with 3 of my friends in the city and when we officially move in and shit we're gonna start decorating it real cool (louis vuitton couches, chanal beds.... haha) no but we'll make it a really cute gurlie apt (like my room back in dtwon) hey sivs u wanna come over and help me paint my walls again? hahaha goood times.

i hear nothing yet alot of things happend in dallas while ive been living here... rachel got herself yet another new boyfriend (lol dont hate), erin went on another really funny date, sivan did... well never mind we get it, zannas parents moved to dc...wtf???, rob is back with mike cuz she's "inlove", and julie is only making out now hahahah. oh and i was talkin to jay the other day and he said yet another one of his "asshole" comments but then he apologized.....WOOAH! yea so i guess ppl do change lol.

hopefully if everything goes as planned i'll be coming to visit this may for PROM AND GRADUATION!!!!!!!! god i do hope things work out as i want them to. in the meanwhile im going to sleep cuz i got family dinner in 2 hrs and then like later tonite one of my friends is throwin a bday party at a club.

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox
~gally, galberta, hoe, slut, skank face, slut bucket, galfy, badass and all those other nicknames i miss being called :)